Episode IV

Reference to the Reference!

March, 2008

Let’s say that we are able to travel in time and go to the March of the same year. APOGEE, technical festival of my college was going on. And as soon as I got the opportunity to head back some two thousand kilometers, the place where I wanted to be, Pune, I rushed back quickly. Sadly, I had no plan for how to find any damn stupid reason to meet Tanvi. And also, I was supposed to go to Kolhapur, a city in southern Maharashtra, first to meet my family. It was certainly where I wanted to be, I’ll say the best place to be. But right now all I could think about was Tanvi.

I got some intel from Adi as soon as I reached there. Tanvi, who is fond of, and very good at robotics, was going to participate in a robotics competition at PICT, Pune on the next day. That was my chance. But, how, where, when and what. I hated all these W’s in exams as well as in real life.

I quickly scanned my contact list for anyone in PICT. Sadly no one appeared in the list. Any friend in Pune who might be participating, but no one and I say no one was in the right place to help me out at that time. Any relative living close by, I asked myself. Again a no and again a roadblock.

I had to find a way and find a way fast. You see, these are the situations I love the most. Deadline approaching towards me as quickly as the lizard in my hostel room approaches tube light.

There was only one way I thought. To participate. To build a good looking racing bot in a night and go back to Pune in the morning as early as possible. Again, I called up the jinn, Adi, and told him to buy some material from some shops and head to Kolhapur as soon as possible. And this guy did exactly what I asked for. You see, when me and Adi work as a team we can make impossible possible. Vice versa is also true, but right now it doesn’t matter.

And of course, we did it. The bot was ready well within the deadline and we left for Pune very early in the morning. Very rare scene that was. Both of us awake at such a deep sleep hour.

Anyway, we reached there in time and I love my luck, I was going to spend a whole day with my angel, Tanvi. As usual, she was looking stunningly beautiful. Wearing a mild orange-pink top and light blue jeans, she was holding her team’s bot in her hands. Wow, I missed a beat of my heart certainly looking at her.

Then again, my brainwaves started working. I decided to complete a mission which I was trying to complete for a long time now. I told myself, “Whatever happens, I’m surely gonna click this angel today and keep her close to me forever.”

After talking of here and there, topic was shifted to the bots. And from there, it was just a matter of time for me. Without giving her or anyone a moment to think, I opened my camera and asked her for a team photo. Without wasting a moment or without waiting for an answer, my cam had four to five of her pics.

You see, why I feel I’m so lucky. I was actually supposed to be in the deserts of Rajasthan right now, I had no plan of how to meet Tanvi, I had no chance to spend a whole day with her, I had no chance of getting her photo, and look at me now, looking at her pic and Tanvi herself one after another. And yes, if it is necessary to mention, this is how I got reference for my sketches.

TO BE CONTINUED . . .

Episode III

Adi the hopeless!

Back to holidays, 2008

Coming back to the holidays now, as soon as I reached Pune after the sem end, I was sure that this is the right time no matter what. So, I told Aditya aka Adi, I’m going to tell Tanvi everything. ‘Adi the hopeless’, that fellow just started laughing when I told him, said, “Ya, ya, I’m sure you will. I’m with you my friend.” I’m telling you, I felt like killing him at that moment.

Let me introduce Adi to you guys. This idiot was my bestest friend for as long as I can remember. Same playschool, same kindergarten and then same high school till 10^th. If that was not enough, his dad and my dad were friends from their college days and his mom and my mom were the closest friends. So, obviously this guy knew everything about Tanvi. Right from the beginning. We used to talk about her all night. I mean, I was the one doing all the talking and he was the listener. And the job of this guy was just to laugh at me all the time. Useless fellow. I hate him, but, undoubtedly he is my best friend.

See the coincidence. Adi and Tanvi are in the same college and hence are now good friends for almost a year now. Wow! World is small. Another coincidence to mention here, Naren is also in the same college.

So, back to Adi. One thing about him, he is a kind of person who’ll do anything for his friends and that too in a weird way. And by weird I mean WEIRD.

I did decide to tell her, but how? That was the biggest question in front of me at that time. It was like Lagaan. Remember Aamir’s dialogue? ‘Cirkit khelna kaunu badi baat naahi hai, Chiku. Bachpan se khelat awat hai. Hum ise gilli-danda kahwat hai aur ee gore Cirkit.’ Don’t know what Cricket is, but we’ll play the game and win it to make our lives better, that should be the way of life. Comparing Lagaan with this situation gives me satisfaction as in the end our hero Aamir Khan did win the game.

Trying to figure out ways to tell Tanvi about my ICU condition, I felt that I’ll really need to go to the ICU soon if I don’t find a way. I was sure that I have to tell her face to face. But meeting her alone somewhere was as difficult a task as going on the sun for morning walk. So, the place has to be her college. Secondly, whenever I see her, I’m

dumbstruck and confused. So, I either keep on talking or forget all the words in the English, Marathi or Hindi dictionary and start to speak a new language, something like, “Uhh… Me… like…. Hmmm…. Na…. So… Ah…. Like…” FUSSSS!!! And, again if you remember, Naren is in the same college. So, option one cut.

“How about calling her?”, suggested Adi, the hive of ideas, but probability of that idea being useful is not so impressive. And that might be the worst idea he has ever given me. I was supposed to tell my dreamgirl on phone what I feel, when I used to speak some alien language whenever I heard her voice. Secondly, from what I heard from others, her parents were not as easygoing as my parents and kind of really strict. So, calling her had its risks and hence option two was certainly out of question.

“Then only one option left. Write a love letter like old days and start singing ‘Kabootar ja ja ja, kabootar ja ja ja…’ That’s the only option now.”, said Adi.

Well, I agree, that was the only option. But kabootar & all is not required nowadays. You see, Google has put Microsoft as well as Kabootars out of business.

So after a lot of humor, from Adi’s side, and a lot of serious discussion, from my side, I decided to write a letter to my sweetheart Tanvi. And my friend gmail was going to deliver every word of mine to my angel’s heart. But, letter… Isn’t it the worst way, I thought. I mean, that was obviously my last choice as how can words express what eyes or expressions can? It’s like, ‘paani nahi hai, to sharaab pi lo’. Not a good one, but simpler way. But I did compromise to this sharaab. So, to cover it up, I decided something more in my mind.

Work in progress!

Holidays, 2008

Friends, let me tell you some facts or some signs which suggest you are in love –

· Excessive staring at unmovable objects and thinking about what if they are alive

· Your words start to rhyme & you actually start liking something as boring as poetry, in extreme cases of Lovaria, you yourself become a poet

· In every form of any stupid art, you start to see meaning and understand it’s beauty (Not at all boys kind of thing)

· You forget about the 3^rd standard Geography textbook and start thinking about sunrise and sunset as something unearthly

· And most importantly, being a boy, I’m very sad to accept it, but you start to believe in love.

So, as a last stage case with all these symptoms, I decided to use some of these symptoms as my weapons. I decided to make some sketches of my angel and make a small pocket diary with some of my poems that I used write whenever I used to think about her at sunsets.

Yes boys, a cautionary note for all you guys, your girls do change you completely. But, believe me, it’s for your own good.

So, as it’s my habit, simplest things first. I sorted out my best works with poetry & got out on streets to find a diary. Oh god, after 2 hours I was still finding a diary. Have they stopped producing simple, lovable diaries or what? Isn’t there a single diary on this earth that will suit my sweet innocent angel?

Continuing my exercise for a couple of days, I finally found something as innocent and as sweet as my angel. A Disney diary. Mickey mouse, Mini Mouse, Goofy, Donald duck, Pluto, etc. I made my own diary by cutting that diary from anywhere and

everywhere. And finally the poetry book was ready. I read all those poems again and felt like telling her right now, “Tanvi, my angel, this earthly soul of Mihir Doot is yours forever. I love you with all my heart.”

But wait. That did not happen. For those who have a habit of reading while feeling sleepy, let me remind you, that sketches that I was supposed to make were still not ready.

To be honest, I’m not Picasso, Da Vinci or even M. F. Hussain for that matter. But, I was determined to beat them as I had one thing those velle people did not have – A heavenly inspiration.

And with that inspiration I was on the mission. Sadly, I was not even a competition for a 5^th grader in sketching. I needed some reference for the sketch. A photo would have been just perfect.

‘Where can I get a photo, where? Where? Where?’

And yessss. As if my brain mistaken the mango mood that I was chewing with mentos, my dimag ki batti was lit like a 200W bulb on the street.

TO BE CONTINUED . . .

Episode II

Healthy interaction - Doot is on the menu!

September, 2007

Fresher year. Engineering college. A night before the test. All you engineers out there can imagine the scenario very easily. All the wingies (wingmates some of you might say) gathered in one room, trying to find out what the syllabus is, what has to be studied, what can be left for option, if anyone has ever attended a lecture, if someone has then did he care to take notes in the lecture, what not. The scene is amazing I tell you, and you have to experience these moments to cherish them throughout your life.

It was 12.30 already. And every piece finally started to fall in right place as all this was kind of a practice now. All of us did the same drill during first test series and test 2 was no surprise to that tradition. But speak of surprises and here it comes. A third year senior stormed into my room & said, “Mihir, someone is here and wants to meet you.”

Obviously I was shocked as I knew what this statement means in the campus lingo. It only means, seniors are getting bored and you are on the menu tonight. I was sure then, that my test tomorrow is screwed now. So, I started revising the intro format in my mind. I entered the room of darkness, den of the devils, place of no solace and what not. An 11’ X 7’ room filled with 3 third yearites, a senior who passed out from the campus two years ago and me of course. Certainly a danger situation.

“Hey Mihir, wanted to meet you bro. I’m Anish”, he said. Whoever you are, why the hell do you want to meet me out of 800 of my batchmates? Prob-stat sucks I said in my mind. Like if he could read minds, he answered my question with another question, “You’re Priya’s cousin right?”

See. When you go some thousands of kilometers away from your home, you are comforted to know that someone who loves you is there with you, to take care of you. But on a college campus, it has its pros and cons.

“So, what are you waiting for? Koi teri aarti nahi utarne wala yaha. Start with your intro”, he said and I started talking like a robotic parrot,

“Good evening sirs. My name is Mihir Doot, sirs. My identification number is 2007XXPracticeSchoolXXX, sirs. My city seniors are ……… ”, I went on and on.

Every time I had made a mistake, I had to restart. After fifteen long minutes I completed my first task. It seemed like these guys were enjoying themselves a lot. They used each and every weapon available for a healthy interaction. That’s a sweet alternative word for ragging. I looked into my fastrack, it was 2.30 already. To practice for tomorrow’s Maths paper, I tried calculating how much time I will be able to sleep. In no case the number was crossing 2 hours, that too with an optimistic approximation.

I was burning from inside. I wanted to cry and at the same time I wanted to kick those senior asses. After an hour or two, when they saw that I was about to break and my actions were becoming quite unpredictable, they turned towards a soft corner.

That Anish guy said, in the style of an inspector or DCP, “Tell me, chicks on the campus that are in your crush list and arrange them according to the preference. Chal, quickly, quickly. We don’t have time for your stupid excuses. We don’t ……… ”, I stopped him.

“Sir, I’ll never answer such a stupid question”, I answered those bandits in a revolutionary manner and gave Anish an angry young man look.

I don’t know why, but he instantly said, “Good, good. So, you have a girlfriend, back home, don’t you?”

With a pause I answered, “No”

“Ohh… One way traffic it seems”, he said.

Again I gave him the same look keeping silence.

“Hmmm. Back home?”

I nodded.

“Does she know how you feel about her?”

“I haven’t told her yet and I’m not sure whether I’m going to tell her or not.”

“Hmmm. Interesting. Now remember, every time you think that you have made a mistake you’ve to slap yourself. And if you don’t then I will. Do you understand?”

Again I nodded silently.

“So, you don’t really love her, it’s just a crush, isn’t it?”

Again the same look and this time the anger was flooding through that.

“Answer you fool”, he said showing his seniorgiri.

“How many of you have had just one ‘crush’ for a couple of years?”, I asked all of them stressing at the word crush.

“Hahahaha. That’s a tough one to answer.”, He said laughing and added, “So, you love her. Then is she not pretty?”

How the hell did he dare to ask. I felt like taking his keyboard, that he was using like a piano, and smashing it on his dumb head.

“Most prettiest girl in this world she is. Don’t you dare to talk about her like that again……. SIR”, I was really angry now.

Looking at me, he just smiled.

“Hmmm. So she is pretty and you love her, that’s for sure. Then do you think that Pune has got no handsome guys who’ll never ask a pretty girl on a date? Are you living in 1947?”

I had no answer for that. I just slapped myself.

“Good. Now, why haven’t you told her then?”

“I’m not sure what she feels and I don’t want her to stop being my friend.”

“Do you think you’ll ever know what she feels without asking her? What did you get to know about what’s in her heart so far?”

Silence for a few moments. Again a slap. He was undoubtedly right about this one. She was really a mystery, I always felt that way. That Harry Potter fan did knew how to charm people, how to stupefy me and keep a mysterious cloak around her. I never understood what’s going through her mind. Sometimes she’ll talk very freely and next day she talks in yes and nos. Sometimes she keeps on talking and sometimes she

won’t talk to me for days. How the hell was I supposed to know what’s in that lovely heart?

So, he continued talking to me and after lots and lots and let me tell you, lots of slaps I realized that waiting is certainly no good option. After listening to all my story he said, “Dude, I’m warning you. You are running out of time. Even if she is not committed now, why the hell do you expect her to wait for you? When she has no idea what you feel for her.”

And that was the shocker. I knew all of this, but listening to this from someone else was worse than getting bathed by melted metal. I knew I’ll have to do something, because I was certainly not ready to be just a friend of her. We knew each other for nearly two years now and yet I knew not a thing hiding in her heart.

Well, the healthy interaction did continue till 4 in the morning. But, believe me, I forgive all of them for all those intros, vulgar questions, activities that I cannot mention here and obviously the slaps, because if it did not happen, probably my courage would have kept failing me at the most important thing in my life.

So, if you are expecting to find out the details of the healthy interaction session to welcome your juniors, sorry to disappoint you, but we’re moving forward now. But this was the incident when I got to know that I have to act, and act quickly.

TO BE CONTINUED . . .

Episode I

Here it begins!

14^th of July, 2008

10 AM. A lazy yawn to start the day and an important one. Of course it was my daily routine to wake up ‘so early’. Wait a second! Don’t get mistaken. I’m not the kind of guy who always spends his priceless time in the chemical locha of his own brain, dream that is. It is just that, after four and half months of kathor parishram in an Aashram situated at some far off desert in some unreachable corner of India, called BITS-Pilani, anyone certainly earns the right to sleep for 10-12 hours a day. So here I was. Not completing my quota of 10 hours, as I was unable to sleep at all, till the sun rose. Let’s wait for some time to answer ‘why’.

Without wasting any more time on the bed, I turned on the screen of my desktop with toothbrush in my mouth and coffee mug in the left hand. Opened my gmail account and attached the doc file and moved the cursor to the send button. Isn’t it July? & isn’t I’m supposed to sweat in this humid and hot weather? Instead, why am I feeling shivers down my spine and standing like a dumb, struck by lightning?

Well, I should give my brain some rest after such a long night, I thought. Turning off the screen again, I washed my face. Kept drinking my strong and extremely sweet coffee, my specialty, as coffee was my closest and most honest friend these days. Ahh! Believe me, the fresh smell of coffee well stirred in cold milk with lot of sugar and a pinch of cocoa and a tablespoon of bournvita, is much better and a lot more addictive than any and every form of alcohol. So, after finishing a liter of coffee I had to stop as my mom would have thrown me out of the house if I would have continued.

So, let’s get back to the main story now. With my ‘ignited mind’, I turned on the computer screen again, not sure whether to click or not. Everything was in place, as I planned. It was like, NASA was about to launch the Apollo and when the countdown reached zero, they decided to have a debate on whether to proceed with the mission or not.

By this time, those of you intelligent readers, whoever is smitten by the love bug in your life ever, will show me some sympathy, as you must have passed through this phase once in your lifetime. After all, it was the moment to show a little courage and to

proceed with the most important decision of my life. But, the good and evil voices in my head were shouting like the lawyers in the court and me being the judge. The problem was, it was not a movie to check out the climax to find out who the good guy is and who’s the bad one.

“Mihir, the lunch is ready”, the voice came like the bell announcing recess and I grabbed the opportunity to take a break. Turning off the screen again, I rushed to the dining room.

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Start of the Beginning!

A little while ago

Let’s go back a little, to start from the beginning. For last couple of months, I was planning to tell this amazing and beautiful creature, that I have feelings for her and I loved this angel more than anything else. My angel, who is perfect combination of beauty and brains. And yet being one of the most humble soul I could ever find. Her beautiful long dark hair, fair and flawless skin, big brown eyes, a little pinkish and a little red, babylike cheeks, slightly greenish shade under the eyes and yes, an everlasting smile……. Tanvi! Just like, if my dream girl came out of my mind and was standing before me.

I have no idea where to start from. But, I do remember perfectly when I first saw her. August of 2005. I was just shifted to Pune for education purpose. 11^th class. And though the attendance over here was (unofficially) not at all compulsory, all the students, including me who has quite good reputation as a bunker, were full of enthu to attend the first few lectures of our ‘college life’. I was obviously sitting at the back of the class, 6^th bench from back, to be specific, in the class of 120 students. And as soon as teacher arrived we started our business, which was certainly not taking notes or anything. Sanmit, who as well shifted to Pune a few days back, started to share his knowledge and to fill empty vessel of my mind with some general knowledge. In simple language, he was telling me names and details about the girls in our class. Very common scene in a classroom.

Though showing him as if I’m not interested, I was listening to him eagerly because I knew he had some information that interests me. After listening to him for more than 300 seconds, I couldn’t handle more and I asked him, “What do you know about that girl?”, pointing towards a beautiful, fair girl in a dark pink top, long hair arranged neatly with the help of a bow, sitting on the second bench. Sincerely and innocently listening to the prof (which hardly anyone does these days) with notebook open on the bench and pen in the hand with the back of it being used as a chewing gum.

Sanmit gave me a long surprised stare, at this sudden question, as I was suddenly showing him interest in his GK, that is girls knowledge.

“Yessss! I was right.”, suddenly he said.

Looking at my puzzled look, he answered, “What the hell do you think of me? Did you feel that we won’t notice anything? You’re staring at that girl from the moment she has come and I was just waiting for this question. Now you see how important this GK is?”

“Naa yaar, nothing like that. It’s just that she is cute. So, I asked”, pathetic try to defend.

“Ya, ya, ya. Save it. That’s Tanvi Nehwal.”, he announced the name of my dreamgirl.

And this is how Koi mil gaya. Then thanks to technology and the representative of the technology – Google, for arranging our first meet. I mean, I found her on Google Orkut.

Well, if I remember correctly and if my sources are trustworthy enough, our start didn’t go very smoothly, as she thought I’m one of those hopeless college studs who was stalking her. And I can’t blame her for that as I really did all those stupid things we see in movies. Who says that movies are not realistic? Because in my personal opinion, they are, and sometimes real life stories are much more dramatic than movies.

Let’s say, my first impression was not so good. We had a common friend, Akshata. Once Tanvi, Akshata and a couple of more friends were together and going somewhere, Akshata called me and when I saw Tanvi with her I just kept mumbling something, walking backwards in front of her, looking at Tanvi when talking to Akshata. Ahh! That was embarrassing.

In another incident, when I was in queue just behind her and someone was calling me, I kept looking at her until she looked back at me. Used to wait at the canteen after practicals hoping she’d come. Hush! Can you blame her for not having a good impression of me? Because, many such incidents can be recalled.

Anyway, without getting into any more details, just know that, our friendship moved forward through the modern stages of friendship, which are, Orkut -> email -> messenger -> gtalk -> SMS -> calls.

But, let’s stop talking about her, at this stage only. Coz if I start to tell you guys all about this angel and incidents related to her, the length of the story will get doubled for sure.

So, even if I was thinking about how to say, what to say for last couple of months… The story started well before that. To be precise, for last two and half year I was crazy for this girl. Yet, never found the right moment to tell her. I’m surprised at how my adventure freak heart becomes a ‘bhigi billi’ in front of this girl. Guys, if you think I’m a looser because of this, then just think of your days and you will see yourself in this position. And those of you who keep telling yourselves, ‘I love my freedom. Who the hell wants to experience that pain and all’, wait for the cupid to find you.

So, where did the story of this ‘how to tell Tanvi’ question start? For this, we have to find answer to a very ‘not related’ question. That question will be, ‘What BITS has given me, which I can say, has changed my life?’

The answer is very straightforward. No guys, we’re not in the same college. But, well, we could have been & then everything would have been a lot easier. Long story. Let’s keep it in the store for now. First let me explain the most important experience in my BITSian life that surely has some part to play in changing my life.

TO BE CONTINUED . . .